well, one of the first. My baby (they all will always be my babies!) started Kindergarten today. I have been thinking about and crying about this day for a while now. And today it was finally here. Can she really be old enough to go to school? Am I ready to let her leave me? Wasn't it just yesterday that I was rocking her in her beautiful pink nursery amazed at how much of my arm she had filled out as I held her? When did she become a "big girl" ready to go to Kindergarten? 
The Preparations:
I guess we've been preparing her for this for a while but we still wonder if we have done enough. We've read millions of books. We've practiced ABC's and 123's. We taught her colors and shapes. We taught her how to say "please" and "thank you". She learned to share and take turns - this one took a while! We've tried to get her used to being away from us a little at a time so it would be easier for her to transition by sending her to Mother's Day Out and Preschool. I think we forgot to prepare ourselves for the transition.
Over the past few weeks we've been busy buying school supplies. I bought all the basics from the list the teacher gave us. Anna found the perfect "Hannah Montana" backpack. We found a "first day of school" outfit that she loved because it had horses on it. There was even a matching pony tail holder and socks- the icing on the cake!
This weekend she and I got to go out - just the girls- to get the last few things: a lunch box, manila paper, and dance shoes. Unfortunately, I waited too long and all the Hannah Montana lunch boxes were gone. I thought she would be soo upset. She handled it very well and simply chose the next best thing - Disney Princesses. It was so nice to have this time with her. I love that she still wants to hold my hand, she doesn't care that I have an ugly pimple on my face, and had to have her purse with her just like me. She would ask me "do you have your purse? Okay, I have mine too". 
Today we all got up early. Dad was in the shower so I got to go in to wake her up. I was so excited to get this moment to myself. Dad got to read her books about going to Kindergarten last night and put her to sleep so this was my turn! When I opened the door she was sound asleep. I said "Hey, Kindergartner, time to wake up! It's the first day of school". She stirred a little. Then, I said "Gotta wake up - it's time to learn!" She smiled, opened her eyes, and said "Mama!". She got right up out of bed and walked to the kitchen to eat her "good breakfast". I was amazed. Some days waking her up for preschool was like waking up a hibernating bear. I think she was ready. I don't think we are.All morning I've been thinking/wondering/worrying:
*Is she going to ask to use the bathroom if she needs to?
*Is she going to have enough to eat? Is one juice box enough? Did I put enough ketchup on her turkey sandwich? Is her teacher going to judge "what kind of parent I am" by what I pack in her lunch?
*Are her new shoes going to make her feet hurt? I rubbed some blister block on first to make sure.
*Will she remember the name of her new teacher? When we asked her this morning she said "Mrs. Tree". It's Mrs. Burns. :)
*Will she feel scared? Will she need comforted and wish I was there?
*Will the people at the school be kind to her? Will they know how special she is? Will they take extra good care of my baby?
The only glitch came when the school personnel who met us at the front door weren't going to let us walk her back to her classroom. I think they sensed it might get ugly from the expression on my face and decided to give us a name tag and let us walk her back. We went to "Meet the Teacher Day" on Friday but they didn't let us go to her classroom so she has never even seen it. It turned out that there were plenty of other parents there too and the teacher even make a little "Survival Kit" for us. She included this little note along with a tissue, cotton ball, Hershey "hug", and tea bag:Dear Parent,
Here is a little "gift" for you as you leave your precious one with me on the first day of school. As you hold this cotton ball in your hand, the softness will help you to remember the gentle spirit of your child. Dry your tears with this tissue, and go home and make yourself a hot cup of tea. Here's a hug to get you through until your child meets you after school. Put up your feet and relax. Remember, together you and I will work for your child to be the best he/she can be.
Thank you for entrusting your child to me for the coming school year. I will do my very best every day to be your child's guide in learning and exploring this bright, new world they've just stepped into.
Anna was so brave. There were no tears or anxious behavior. She walked in very confident and poised. She easily took her seat and gave me a hug and kiss. After, I let Chris go in to say good bye. As we were walking home I noticed him making these little funny sounds. When I looked at him I could see that he wanted to tell me something but was trying not to cry. He said that when she kissed him good bye it was like she was saying "It's okay. I'm going to be fine". He kept repeating that she was going to have fun and this was a good thing. We both know that it's true but still need to keep reminding ourselves so it doesn't hurt so much.
It's been pretty quiet today without her here - with the exception of Luke's crying (he's having difficulty sleeping and we're "crying it out" - but that's another post). It's only been a few hours but I already miss her dancing around, singing, talking to her imaginary boyfriend "Nicholas", or playing dress up and pretending "something romantic" (a recent response we over hear her saying) - oh, and fighting with Jaden! She's been away from me before and I know she'll be back (and very soon - about an hour or so) but I guess this time is different because I know she will be gone everyday and I can't just go and get her or keep her home because I want some more time with her. I am so proud of her. I hope she knows that. I know she's going to learn so much this year. I know that we will too!(Make sure you listen to the new song I added to the playlist - it should be playing as you are reading this but just incase you have your volume turned off. It's called "Anna".)
